I look forward to summer break just as much as my students do. In April, I start my countdown to the days of no alarms or work clothes, and I make a to-do list that is a balance of deep cleaning and outings with the kids. During this time off, the house stays neat and tidy, Pinterest-inspired dinners are cooked, and everyone has clean underwear all the time. Summer makes me feel like a modern-day June Cleaver, fueling in me the desire to be a stay-at-home mom (a desire usually snuffed out by mid-July.) This year was no exception as I eagerly awaited the end of May, marking the close of a great school year and the beginning of an even better summer.
However, June is now almost over, and nothing from my summer to-do list has been checked off. In fact, summer break has been the complete opposite of what I had envisioned. The rain has been incessant all month, so beach trips and other outdoor excursions have been replaced with inside activities. Trips to the grocery store have been few and far between, so lavish meals have been replaced with sandwiches and chips, fish sticks and tater tots, or anything else I can find in the pantry that will keep the family alive another day.
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| When he gets bored, he climbs walls. |
For some moms, rainy days at home inspire productivity, but rain acts as a sedative to me. When it is rainy, I don’t fancy changing out of my pj’s or brushing my hair- much less scrubbing toilets and organizing closets. In fact, I wrote on my to-do list “binge watch a show on Netflix” just so I could mark something off. In the last two weeks, I have become a fan of Survivor since Amazon Prime has 20-something seasons for me to watch, and I now know exactly how I would make it to the final three if I am ever chosen as a contestant. (Wouldn’t a season of mothers against their teen children be fun to watch?! Tribe names could be exotic sounding words that translate to ungrateful and under appreciated.)
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| VBS kept us busy a few nights! |
Many moms would use these rainy days to spend much-needed quality time with their children. The first three days were exactly that. We cooked together. When I did my Bible study, Olivia read hers. We hung out on the couch and watched movies, and Asher even did chores with no complaining at all. But just as fruit rots and milk spoils, the harmony in our little tribe soon turned to discord. The bickering and complaining began and I longed to leave camp for some peace and quiet. If only I could be voted off the Island.
At this point, my momming now resembles less of June Cleaver and more of Rosanne Conner. Dysfunction has reached new levels in our home, and I don’t know how many more rainy days I can take before I enroll them ALL in daycare. I came to this epiphany a few days ago when my three-year-old, wearing only a pull-up and a superhero cape, stood at the back door licking the glass like it was a cotton candy flavored sno-cone (his favorite). As I yelled, “stop licking the door!”, I knew that if Mother Nature didn’t lay off with the rain soon, delirium was going to overtake me.
Here are some things that I never imagined I would utter this summer, but ashamedly I have:
- Stop trying to light your sister’s hair on fire.
- You can’t put the dog in the dishwasher.
- Have you bathed this week?
- Why do you have lip gloss on, son?
- Did you just scratch your butt and then grab watermelon out the bowl?
- Please stop feeding the dog your boogers.
- Who put coins in my glass of water?
- You can’t go to the mailbox in your underwear. Put on pants before you open that door!
- Do not put another Ramen noodle up your nose!
- Stop asking your brother to smell your feet while he is eating tacos! He can smell them after dinner.
Luckily, the forecast shows a little sunshine heading our way, and nothing will help me regain my sanity like salt water in my hair and sugary white sand between my toes. But I know that, although our shenanigans may move outdoors, the craziness that makes us us will continue, and I look forward to it with a mixture of excitement and anxiety.
As I sit here on the couch at two in the afternoon- still in my pajamas with unbrushed hair- my toddler is sweetly nestled up beside me watching the Spanish version of PJ Masks, which neither of us understands, and he is eyeing a booger on the end of his finger that he discovered on his cheek from a recent emotional meltdown he had over having to share a toy with his sister…..and the list of ludicrous things I must say to my children this summer continues.
